Day 199 Y25 Thought of the Day_Detours

You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. It may be necessary to encounter the defeat, so you can know who you are.

Maya Angelou

When you’re dealing with yet another setback, it’s hard not to feel defeated. It isn’t easy to find the strength to overcome.

The feeling of helplessness is overwhelming, as you hit another blank wall. You’re tempted to bang your head against it, even if you know it won’t change anything.

At times it is hard to discern whether those setbacks were meant to make us re-examine our plan and alter the course of our lives.

It could be a detour, which may seem like we are being derailed from our path, but it eventually leads back to the same intended outcome at the end of the journey.

I’m struggling with that in my current situation, mostly because I’m a planner. When I decided to immigrate to Canada with my son, I thought I had a solid 5-year plan.

I finished the first part of it, completing my academic upgrading for 2 years and getting an open work permit good for 3 years. I planned on gaining Canadian work experience and becoming eligible for one of the immigration pathways for foreign skilled workers before the expiry is up.

However, this year has been a series of setbacks. I can’t even catch my breath. The anxiety of my well-laid plans going awry was keeping me up at night.

Nevertheless, I’ve had worse encounters with defeat than this, and I have overcome them. Though it took a while, things always worked out, when all the pieces fell into place.

Those setbacks don’t define who we are. How we carry ourselves in the path of self-discovery, as we rise above adversity and persevere over the obstacles that come our way, shapes the person that we become.

What those moments taught me is that it is okay to slow down, step back, and stay still. Gain your bearings so you can find the inner strength to persevere another day.

These detours, even when it feels like we are “off track”, gives us the opportunity to build resilience, clarify what truly matters and appreciate the person that we have become.